Decided to do it, huh?
Hoot Mon! You Got Class!
You know, we could both end up on Montel
Wouldn't that be incredibly keen?
Okay, maybe not...but sayyyyyy, we'd get a free trip to New York, (or is it Chicago? Philly? L.A.?--who cares, it FREE!) and THAT is the what the modern Something for Nothing (SFN) Philosopher wants most next to bribe money - FREE TRAVEL! And where else but to the bastion of SFN, the Mecca of Modern Greed - the television talk show! WOW, WE MIGHT EVEN GET TO DO JERRY SPRINGER!!!! Wait, but then you'd have to hit me, and I'd have to stalk you after the show....and that would be no fun....
Heck. I tell you what - if we go, let's ditch the show and have a GREAT time on their money! We'll show them something for nothing! But then, we'd probably miss the free feast in the backstage green room before the show, and you know how we feel about free food...okay, we'll do the show. Just don't hit hard, okay? And I promise, no guns or knives. Well, maybe knives....
Gee, all these decisions and excitement, and all because you were the first on your block to GIVE US FIVE DOLLARS!!!! CAN YOU STAND IT????
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